tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-56227721186978299912024-02-08T02:06:14.964-08:00Unemployed in ManayunkErmtheWormhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07093271867207488312noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622772118697829991.post-59574674456296061342011-10-12T13:10:00.000-07:002011-10-12T13:11:06.390-07:00The Good Life<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">You haven’t heard from me for a while, probably because in the last few weeks I have been far too busy enjoying “the good life.” And by “the good life” I mean reading children’s books, going for long walks and watching “Scrubs.” So pretty fraking good. Maybe I haven’t written for a while because the title of my blog no longer makes sense; I am technically employed, after all, even if my job officially starts this coming Monday. A more apt title would be something along the lines of “Life After College in Manayunk” or “Employed at Three Part-Time Jobs in Manayunk.” Neither have quite the right pathos. Even if it is no longer particularly accurate, I’m sticking with the title because it’s gotten me this far. By “this far” I mean through the six or so posts I’ve actually put here. Through all my lazy days at home, I haven’t been able to find the time to update every once in a while, by which, of course, I mean I have watched way too many episodes of Scrubs. But I digress.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> The prospect of returning to work has got me thinking. Even though at times sitting at home I have been bored out of my mind, antsy, dissatisfied, felt useless and broke, worried about funny smells, wished I could be somewhere else, there are many things I’m going to miss about being unemployed (or occasionally employed as I am now). No more long walks every day that always seem to end up at the house up on Green Lane with the pot-bellied pig (it’s so ugly that it’s adorable). No more grilled cheese and tomato soup for lunch every day (unless I bring a hot plate to work). No more sipping my absurdly large cup of coffee, leisurely eating my oatmeal and watching anywhere from three to five episodes of my Scrubs back to back. No more sitting down in the middle of the day and reading a book cover to cover. But to replace all those things I will have a steady source of income doing something that I’m pretty sure I’ll love. I’ll still be able to go on walks, even if they’re not as long. I’ll still read my books cover to cover, though it might take me an extra day. While I’ll miss tomato soup, there’s always the weekend, and I could certainly do with less TV in my life. Most of all, I am looking forward to that tired feeling I get after a day of work, the feeling that tells me I’ve done something productive and helps me fall asleep without tossing and turning for an hour. Through my time without a job, I’ve come to understand myself as a person who likes to do, to accomplish things, not to sit at home like a blob. I find this understanding immensely comforting, poised as I am at the brink of a lifetime of work to do. </span></div>ErmtheWormhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07093271867207488312noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622772118697829991.post-56977577413318214862011-09-19T13:12:00.000-07:002011-09-19T13:13:15.139-07:00Some Good News...with a Caveat<div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">This morning I got the good news that I’ve been waiting for: they’re hiring me at the children’s bookstore! But…there’s a catch. They won’t be taking me on until October 16<sup>th</sup>. That’s almost a month from now. How will I keep from dipping too far into my savings account as I wait for my life as an employed citizen? To begin, I already have a once or twice a month (or three times, as it’s turning out) gig working the front desk at the Schuylkill Center, which provides me with eight hours of sitting on my ass and getting paid to knit. Pretty sweet, but only covers my groceries and my fuel, if I’m careful. I’ve also been writing copy for websites, but that pays a stunning $.01 per word, so not going to get rich on that one any time soon. My other job at the Schuylkill Center as an educator starts next week, but again is super part time. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">So…where then will I find the money to pay the approximately $150 a week that I need for utilities and rent? </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I give you now, ladies and gentlemen, my grand plan for becoming wealthy in the next month (or at least, some ideas. I certainly have no shortage of time to scheme):</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Idea Number One: I will find someone to sponsor my extensive walking trips around Manayunk. Maybe Nike would be willing to pay me $.01 a step. I could spray the bottom of my shoes with water (or paint) and leave little Nike prints all over the place. It would be fabulous advertising. If they don’t bite, I could always take my bid to Adidas or Puma. Perhaps I could even get a new pair of tennis shoes thrown into the bargain.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Idea Number Two: Using my fabulous knitting skills, I will start a business knitting custom sweaters for lap dogs. This is a perfect idea, since I can also sell my wares to the approximately 14 dog boutiques on Main Street.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Idea Number Three: Since my neighborhood is full of college students, I will start a paper writing service. For just $.10 a word, I will write you the A grade paper you have always dreamed of (provided it’s on something English-y). Then again, I think someone has already <a href="http://chronicle.com/article/The-Shadow-Scholar/125329/">cornered the market</a> on this one. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Idea Number Four: With the power of only one 12-inch non-stick frying pan and a four burner gas stove, I will start a catering business specializing in fried rice and curry. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Idea Number Five: Become a psychic and make over my bedroom into a “den of truth” (or something to that effect). This course of action might require me to purchase a crystal ball and/or tarot cards, so it’s maybe not the most viable one right now.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">With all these exciting options for the next month, how could I go wrong? Though, on second thought, maybe I should just try babysitting.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div>ErmtheWormhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07093271867207488312noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622772118697829991.post-64858037895351045392011-09-01T15:05:00.000-07:002011-09-01T18:03:05.549-07:00Sound Advice for your Next Interview<div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Interviewing can be tough even if you’re not on the shy side of the social spectrum like me. But, you can succeed at any interview if you just follow these few simple steps:</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">1. Never, under any circumstances, eat anything that will make you fart excessively during your interview. Trying to smile while holding in copious amounts of gas is no one’s idea of a good time. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">2. Wear a shirt that fits. Trust me on this one. You don’t want your future employer to think you are checking yourself out when really you are just worried about the continual descent of your neckline and the imminent exposure of your bra to the world (or your chest hair (?) if you are a guy—I really don’t know an equivalent. Do guys worry about exposing their chest hair?)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">3. Go to the bathroom before your interview. Anything that will prevent you from doing the “my bladder is going to explode” dance in the interviewer’s office is probably worth your time. Unfortunately, I also know this one from experience.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">4. Try not to eat a lot of garlic before your interview, especially if your future boss is a vampire. Or would the <i>exception</i> be if your future boss is a vampire? That needs more thought.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">5. Make eye contact! But not the creepy “I am watching your every move and trying to understand the deepest secrets of your soul” kind of eye contact. Unless you are interviewing to be a psychic, in which case that kind of eye contact would be completely appropriate.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">6. Smile, smile, smile, smile. And smile some more. And if you feel like not smiling anymore…smile! Seriously, it works miracles.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Most of all, try to have a good time. If you make a mistake, just remember it will make a good story to tell the grandkids. Which it probably won’t, but who says you can’t dream a little?</span></div>ErmtheWormhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07093271867207488312noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622772118697829991.post-29612304265882183002011-08-30T16:15:00.001-07:002011-08-30T16:15:45.359-07:00!!<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Just got my first call for a real, actual legit job that would help me with my future career plans: selling kids books! Given, I cited selling hot dogs at a garage sale as sales experience, but here's hoping.</span>ErmtheWormhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07093271867207488312noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622772118697829991.post-68871547029082161652011-08-29T14:16:00.001-07:002011-08-29T14:17:43.697-07:00Job Idea<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Today I made a grand total of $8 writing copy for textbroker.com. $8!</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I gotta find me a real gig sometime soon.</span>ErmtheWormhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07093271867207488312noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622772118697829991.post-14315488942352320932011-08-29T07:45:00.000-07:002011-08-29T14:18:03.760-07:00Marketable Skills<div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I've been in school for the last nineteen years of my life, so this is the first time since I was three that I haven’t been getting ready to go to school at the end of August. All that schooling must account for something, right? Like these eleven reasons why any company should hire me instantly:</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> 1. I can knit as fast as your grandmother</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> 2. I can reach things on high shelves</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> 3. I can pick up things on the floor with my feet</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> 4. I can write a mean English essay in three hours or less</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> 5. I know enough camp songs to put a troll to sleep</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> 6. I can read cursive</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> 7. I can summarize the plots of at least twenty Grimms’ fairy tales </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> 8. I can and have used all the gadgets on my Swiss Army knife</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">9. I know the proper way to peel and chop an onion</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> 10. I can accurately identify almost all Flogging Molly songs within the first ten seconds</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">11. I once memorized the first twelve stanzas of Poe’s “The Raven”…and I’d do it again. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Now I just need to find a job that requires me to knit while reaching (with my feet) to a high place to chop onions with my Swiss Army knife, frantically writing an essay about Grimms’ tales in cursive, singing “The Raven” to the tune of “Barges” and simultaneously indentifying the names of a string of Flogging Molly songs to my stupefied audience. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I’ll let you know what I find.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><i>Update: On second thought, maybe I should just drive a horse-drawn cab.</i></span></div>ErmtheWormhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07093271867207488312noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622772118697829991.post-17455840278630882722011-08-28T13:44:00.000-07:002011-08-29T14:18:48.729-07:00Facts and Figures<div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of months since I graduated from Bryn Mawr: <b>3</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of weeks that summer camp kept me employed: <b>10</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of viable jobs I currently have: <b>0</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of job applications I have submitted so far: <b>6</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of Craigslist ads I have looked at: <b>approx. 1532098098</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of jobs, out of those that I have been qualified for: <b>maybe 2</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of companies looking for someone with computer skills and/or retail experience: <b>392340</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of companies looking for someone with awesome English skills: <b>0</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Most interesting job I have found so far: <b>Horse-drawn cab driver in Center City (<a href="http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/etc/2552241873.html">http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/etc/2552241873.html</a> if you are interested)</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Places where I have applied, in order of relevance to my overall life goals (most to least relevant):</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Free Library of Philadelphia (homework helper)</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Character Development Bookstore (sales associate)</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">The Schuylkill Center for Environmental Education (environmental educator)</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Micheal’s Crafts (sales associate)</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Starbucks (barista)</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Top Tails Dog Walking Company (dog walker and slave)</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of places that I have heard back from so far: <b>2</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Of those, number who could only offer me about 4 hours a week: <b>1</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number that would TAKE OVER my life and not pay well: <b>1</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Places that will be receiving a resume and cover letter from me in the next few days:</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Learning by Grace (Christian homeschooling online teacher– more on this later)</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Eastern State Penitentiary (tour guide)</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Cupcakes Gourmet (sales person)</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Hours that I just spent writing this blog that might have been better spent writing said cover letters: <b>.75</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Number of hurricanes that have hit Philadelphia since I started looking for a job: <b>1</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">If only I could use that as an excuse.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"> </span></div>ErmtheWormhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07093271867207488312noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622772118697829991.post-15805677527283890252011-08-28T13:04:00.000-07:002011-08-28T13:45:48.149-07:00Welcome to the "Real World"!<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Let's make a long story short: I am a recent graduate, the economy stinks, I'm living in Philly and I looking for a job. What better reason to start a blog?</span>ErmtheWormhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07093271867207488312noreply@blogger.com1