This morning I got the good news that I’ve been waiting for: they’re hiring me at the children’s bookstore! But…there’s a catch. They won’t be taking me on until October 16th. That’s almost a month from now. How will I keep from dipping too far into my savings account as I wait for my life as an employed citizen? To begin, I already have a once or twice a month (or three times, as it’s turning out) gig working the front desk at the Schuylkill Center, which provides me with eight hours of sitting on my ass and getting paid to knit. Pretty sweet, but only covers my groceries and my fuel, if I’m careful. I’ve also been writing copy for websites, but that pays a stunning $.01 per word, so not going to get rich on that one any time soon. My other job at the Schuylkill Center as an educator starts next week, but again is super part time.
So…where then will I find the money to pay the approximately $150 a week that I need for utilities and rent?
I give you now, ladies and gentlemen, my grand plan for becoming wealthy in the next month (or at least, some ideas. I certainly have no shortage of time to scheme):
Idea Number One: I will find someone to sponsor my extensive walking trips around Manayunk. Maybe Nike would be willing to pay me $.01 a step. I could spray the bottom of my shoes with water (or paint) and leave little Nike prints all over the place. It would be fabulous advertising. If they don’t bite, I could always take my bid to Adidas or Puma. Perhaps I could even get a new pair of tennis shoes thrown into the bargain.
Idea Number Two: Using my fabulous knitting skills, I will start a business knitting custom sweaters for lap dogs. This is a perfect idea, since I can also sell my wares to the approximately 14 dog boutiques on Main Street.
Idea Number Three: Since my neighborhood is full of college students, I will start a paper writing service. For just $.10 a word, I will write you the A grade paper you have always dreamed of (provided it’s on something English-y). Then again, I think someone has already cornered the market on this one.
Idea Number Four: With the power of only one 12-inch non-stick frying pan and a four burner gas stove, I will start a catering business specializing in fried rice and curry.
Idea Number Five: Become a psychic and make over my bedroom into a “den of truth” (or something to that effect). This course of action might require me to purchase a crystal ball and/or tarot cards, so it’s maybe not the most viable one right now.
With all these exciting options for the next month, how could I go wrong? Though, on second thought, maybe I should just try babysitting.